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Thanks, But No Thanks!

Can you imagine how communication channels would open up if we listened actually to hear what people are saying?

Recently I did some soul searching as a result of some encounters that made me look at who I have been to people.

Sometimes to help or aid people, we do more damage to relationships. I am sure you are asking how is that possible?

Here is how, when someone shares an issue, incident, or roadblock, and without even hearing what they have done already or the attempts they have made to solve the point, some of us begin sharing unwanted and unnecessary “solutions.” We say, “what you should have done or what you could have done is.” Now the person who shared their issue with you is not only frustrated but insulted, especially if they have already gone to great lengths and tried what you suggested, plus some. 

Consider this, the next time you want to offer up advice or help solve the problem, ask the question, “Is there anything I can do to help?” Or “Would you like help?”

Can you imagine how those two questions may open the door for communication, salvage a relationship, or you may uncover the person just needed to vent? Think about that person in your life who had annoyed you when you were dealing with an issue that you exhausted nearly every possible solution for. 

Often, people are not the issues our communication methods/styles are the issues or lack thereof. Try something new when encountered with the opportunity to respond. Listen and then ASK if they want the help you are itching to provide. 

Good luck as you go and interact with friends, family and the world. 

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